Wow! It has been almost 2 months since I last blogged here. What the f*** happened to me? Well, I just got bored, plain and simple. And since I’m not monetizing on this endeavour - in fact i’m losing countless brain cells and neurons just to come up with a decent blog.

And thanks to my friend that we will be naming Ruel for anonymity, I have a new entry for my blog, this entry is aptly entitle FUHA. What is FUHA? Well I have to share a little ‘backgrounder’ on that infamous term.

One night, while traversing along a major throughway we talked about sex. Yes that 3 letter word that guys love to talk all day and all night long. Somewhere along our conversation the word FUBU came up. Ruel, that innocent looking maniac guy, asked, what is ‘FUBU’. We told him it means ‘gwapo’ or handsome. But he didn’t fall for it - he is freaking learning. So we told him the truth, FUBU stands for F*** ____, he quipped aha! fucking bubuyog, what a guy, so we said, it’s F*** Buddy. Oh, smirking, do you guys have fubu before? Silence settled in the car and he quickly blurted the now infamous term (well within the confines of our office), I only tried FUHA. We jolted, what the hell is FUHA? Fuha you know, laughing at his own words, Fucking hand! And chaotic laughter dawned upon us.

This is the second part of my foreigner friend’s funny observation about Filipino cultures.

Friend: Hey janjan, why does Filipino have two names?
Me: What do you mean by that?
Friend: For example, your name, it’s janjan, same as dondon’s name.
Me: Oh, you mean we like to have repetitive names in our nicks.
Friend: Yes. What’s the deal with that?
Me: I really don’t know the reason (cause at that time I really don’t know the reason)
Friend: OK.

But now I think I have an incling on why we ‘love’ repetitive nicknames. See Filipino names are not that unique so we tend to repeat the name to differentiate a person from another one with the same name. John is different from JohnJohn which in turn is different from Johnnyboy. I am also betting that the reason we have repetitive names is that it just rolls out of our tongue or maybe the person we are calling are semi-deaf. For example, I called john’s attention but he is semi-deaf, so I have to say, ‘john, john listen to me’ so in a way your name becomes johnjohn. Well that is my reason. What do you think about it? Why do we ‘love’ having repetitive nicknames.

Woohoo! Having a blast so far in Davao City, nothing beats home. But before anything else I’ll ramble some rant. Just before I paid the entrance fee in Manila Domestic Airport a guy, with his best chum (I hope), just sidestepped me and immediately paid their tickets. They were supposed to be behind me but a guard (unfortunately) recognized them and gave them priority. I thought at first that maybe they were acquaintances but when I tried to look at the person - tada - he is a local politician in Davao City. Such a shame sir! And you want us to vote for you for a much higher position, well FU. And what’s worst was that you didn’t just said, ’sensya ha’ you just stood there and mind you own little business of cheating a simple ‘fall in line’ command.

On another note, barangay election is coming up and surprise surprise according to a neighbor, only rich people now can run for public office, wow, even in a barangay level the stakes are high, so high that even barangay officials wanna-be are giving PHP 100 to potential ’suckers’ or at least in Makati. Oh well. Election time is really here.

My Danish colleague has some interesting observations about the Filipino cultures. And I would like to share it with the reading masses - if there are people reading this blog.

Danish: Why do Filipino cover ONLY their hair with their palm when it rains?
Me: Err, I haven’t thought of that.
Danish: Do you have something in your hair to protect that you would sacrifice your whole body to get soaked?
Me: Funny thing is Filipinos love their hair! Actually I think it is embedded in us that once our head is wet we are susceptible to fever.
Danish: OK.

Jeepney drivers are funny bunch of people. Here are the different segways they like to crack and which I heard myself.

Driver: Konteng urong lang, maluwag pa yan, ginagamit yan araw-araw. (Please move, there are still seats available, they are used everyday)

Driver: Oh yung wala pang bayad, maraming po akong pinapakaing anak. (To those that haven’t paid yet, remember I have many mouths to feed)

Again I remembered a conversation I had with a taxi driver.

Driver: Sir, so long-distance pala kayo ng girlfriend mo? (Sir, so you are in a long-distance relationship?)
Me: Yes. She is in Davao.
Driver: Talaga? Ganyan rin ako dati sir, trabaho naman ako sa Saudi. (Really? I was on the same situation as you are, but I’m in Saudi that time.) 
Driver: Be sure lang sir na hindi malibog gf mo. (Make it sure sir that your gf is not horny.) 
Me: Why you say so?
Driver: Kasi sir nung kami ng asawa ko habang malayo ako sa akin lang talaga. (Because when I was abroad my wife just belongs to me.) 
Me: How can you be sure?
Driver: Kasi sir ganito yan. Pag after nyong mag sex ng babae if hihingi pa yan ng isa, patay, malibog yan, maghahanap yan ng iba basta maka kantot lang. Pero pag hindi na sir, gaya ng asawa ko, safe ka. Sa’yo lang talaga siya. (The thing is this. After you have sex with a girl, when she still asks for another round then holy crap! she is a horny bastard. That type of girl will look for another man just to satisfy herself. Unlike my wife sir, she doesn’t ask, that’s the safe bet. She will be yours.) 
Me: Talaga lang ha…. *hmmm* (Really…. *hmmm*)

Well there I was. I went to Makati Medical Center because I’m feeling an ache in my back. My initial reaction was (again!) UTI. But then again I think it is not UTI. Last year I had one, and it was freakingly painful for a week. But this, the pain only appears in the morning. My other theory is that it is caused by my bed foam. My housemate told me he experienced it too. But I don’t want to second guess, so I went immediately to the doctor (it’s free).

Me: Doc, morning.
Doc: O ano problema? (Yes, what’s the problem?)
Me: Doc, feel ko may UTI ata ako, sakit likod ko. (Doc, I feel like I’m having a UTI, my back is aching.) 
Doc: Ah, may history ba kayo ng highblood? O sakit sa puso? (Oh, do you have a history of highblood? heart ailments?)
Me: *Why is he asking me about heart?*
Me: Yes, papa ko namatay heart attack. (Yes, my father died of heart attack.)
Doc: Ok. Kuha ka lahat ng lab test. (Ok. Then you should take all the laboratory test.)
Doc: Tapos, papa threadmill stress test kita. (Then, you’ll undergo threadmill stress test.)
Me: *Stress test? Oh why? What’s this got to do with my back pain?*

Then he handed me a piece of paper. *Oh so that’s why, this doctor is a cardiologist* *Oh well, better take the test, it’s for my own good.*

Last Friday, as I said in the previous post, we centered our conversation on marriage.

Ches: Paano nyo nalaman na siya na nga? (So how did you know that, that girl is the one?)
Me: Si Paul dapat sumagot nyan at si Del. (Paul should answer that one and also Del.)
Ches: Prepaid ba? (Is it prepaid?)
Del: Anong prepaid? (WTH is prepaid?) 
Ches: Prepaid yung tawag pag nabuntis mo yung babae kaya kayo magpapakasal. (Prepaid is the term used when the girl is pregnant before marrying her.)
Del: Ahh, di naman. Naisip ko na talagang mag-asawa. (Nope, I just thought it was the time.)
Paul: Prepaid sana, kaso nakunan before ikasal. (Yup, it’s prepaid, but was miscarried.) 

Yesterday, my housemate and I dined at Yamazaki in Little Tokyo, Makati.

Waitress: O, sir, kayo na namang dalawa. (Welcome! It’s the two of you again)
Me: Yes, we are on a date.
Waitress and Nep: *hahaha*
Waitress: Baka naman magkainlovan kayo nyan. (Maybe you two will fall for each other)
Waitress: Di nyo kasi dinadala mga gf nyo. (Why won’t you bring along your girlfriends)
Me: Sa September pa, dito pa kami kakain. (In September she will be here and we are going to dine here)
Waitress: Talaga ha? Ano ba kayong dalawa? (Really? What’s the score between you two then?)
Me: Nag lilive in na kami. (We are in co-habitation)
Waitress and Nep: *hahahaha*

I heard a couple of guys (well you do the math) chatting while waiting for their coffee.

Guy 1: I’m gonna change my order

Guy 2: Why, I thought you liked iced tea?

Guy 1: I don’t like a cold tea, I want a hottie.

*laughter*